Recently I found myself reading through old journal entries. Sometimes I like to do this to see how far God has brought me... or just to relive some memories.
I stumbled upon one from 2006 that was just oozing with the realization about how much God loves me...
Here's the story...
I was having REALLY tough issues of not feeling like I was good enough, and struggling a ton with depression. At this time in my life depression was one of my closest friends. On this one occassion, this one night when I was home alone and just surrounded in the murkiness of depression I went outside to try and get away from everything. At this point I was living out in the country where the only neighbors I had were cows, cows, and more cows :) I laid out on the grass in the middle of my big yard in complete darkness (it was a cloudy night) and started to cry out to God... I felt like I was completely alone... God wasn't listening. Why would He? I remember saying "show me a sign to let me know You're here." Before I could even start to feel ashamed for asking God to prove Himself the sky was FILLED with stars... The clouds had COMPLETELY disappeared... My heart started to melt. Then a brilliant shooting star shot across the sky... I knew at that exact moment that God was there... that He was listening... and that He LOVED me... and He had NEVER left my side...
God knows our hearts... God hears our prayers. Even when it seems like you are the last person God wants to hear from or love on... He is right there anticipating the next thing You'll say to Him. He LOVES you... He loves YOU! You are precious to Him... He has never created anything else like you... You are His jewel.
Ask God to show you a sign of His love for you... It may be a sky filled with stars, or a bay covered in starfish (as in "Captivating" by Jhn and Stasi Eldredge). Just as you are unique to God, so is His love for you... and He wants to show it you. Just ask. I would love to hear what you find!
Friday, November 12, 2010
Friday, November 5, 2010
Spent the Night With The Lions... Not a Scratch To Be Seen...
I know its been an EXTREME amount of time since I last posted something (atleast I feel like it has haha). I wanted to take the opportunity to catch you up on everything going on in my life :)
If you read "Caught In A Den of Lions" you know that life got TOUGH... really tough. But I knew that God had something planned for me to come out of the toughness. The past 4 months have possibly been the GREATEST learning experience of my life.
As I wrote I lost my car and my apartment within a few short days... And as I said I was going to I remained peaceful through the whole experience. I knew that I obviously couldn't trust in myself anymore... I had done that for WAYYYY too long and it got me nowhere. And left me with nothing to my name...
Since I decided to trust God my life took a 180...
I now live somewhere RENT FREE, and I have a WONDERFUL, safe, dependable car that I got for a ridiculously low price (by the GRACE of God).
But God didn't stop there... :)
Oh, not in the least bit.
I was offered a better place to work and now do what I LOOOOOOVE.
I got ENGAGED to the man of my dreams!
The church that Adam interned at this summer offered him the youth pastor position at their campus in Winchester. Our first youth event is this Sunday!
Not only did God take care of the things I felt I needed... but He blessed me beyond that with things I had been dreaming about for a long time. I say all of this, just to encourage you to TRUST God. He brings you through the valley or the lion's den for a greater prupose. My purpose was to learn to lean only on Him, I had NOTHING, so He became my EVERYTHING. God does not bring us through trials as a way of showing His disappointment with us, but to lavish His love upon us... and bring us into the relationship we were created to have with Him.
Whatever you have on your shoulders... lay it on God's. Trust Him. He will bring you through and reveal His love and Will to you, without a scratch to be seen!
If you read "Caught In A Den of Lions" you know that life got TOUGH... really tough. But I knew that God had something planned for me to come out of the toughness. The past 4 months have possibly been the GREATEST learning experience of my life.
As I wrote I lost my car and my apartment within a few short days... And as I said I was going to I remained peaceful through the whole experience. I knew that I obviously couldn't trust in myself anymore... I had done that for WAYYYY too long and it got me nowhere. And left me with nothing to my name...
Since I decided to trust God my life took a 180...
I now live somewhere RENT FREE, and I have a WONDERFUL, safe, dependable car that I got for a ridiculously low price (by the GRACE of God).
But God didn't stop there... :)
Oh, not in the least bit.
I was offered a better place to work and now do what I LOOOOOOVE.
I got ENGAGED to the man of my dreams!
The church that Adam interned at this summer offered him the youth pastor position at their campus in Winchester. Our first youth event is this Sunday!
Not only did God take care of the things I felt I needed... but He blessed me beyond that with things I had been dreaming about for a long time. I say all of this, just to encourage you to TRUST God. He brings you through the valley or the lion's den for a greater prupose. My purpose was to learn to lean only on Him, I had NOTHING, so He became my EVERYTHING. God does not bring us through trials as a way of showing His disappointment with us, but to lavish His love upon us... and bring us into the relationship we were created to have with Him.
Whatever you have on your shoulders... lay it on God's. Trust Him. He will bring you through and reveal His love and Will to you, without a scratch to be seen!
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