Day 1

Life has been tough lately. I desperately need to share my story because I know so many people around me are going through the same thing. Waiting.

Adam and I had the amazing opportunity to work with the youth of a new church in Winchester from January 2011-June 2012. Never in my life did I know my heart could hold so much love. The teens in the youth group had honestly become our kids... I would have (and still would) lay down my life for any of them. As Adam and I heard their stories... struggles... we knew God had placed us there for a reason... we had planned to stay for many years and watch the youngest graduate from high school. But, in January of 2012 after an AMAZING retreat God started tugging at our hearts... He was asking us to walk away...
Our hearts broke.
How could we leave our family?
And where did God want us to go?

In January of 2008 God ignited a passion in Adam and I for Hagerstown, Maryland. We knew someday God would lead us to Hagerstown, but we had no idea when. From January 2012-June 2012 God began reignited that passion. Adam and I feel that Hagerstown is where he'll be leading us next... but we don't know when or how. The past year (almost) has been a CONSTANT waiting period for Adam and I and constant struggle financially and emotionally... I cannot tell you how my heart aches to be in Hagerstown doing what I know God has promised us. I am realizing now that God has kept us on hold because he wanted our hearts to be in the right place. After a talk with Adam this morning about the election (strange enough) I am realizing my attitude is changing and I now love the people in Maryland even more. I have honestly been bitter and at points depressed waiting for God to open the doors, but now I know that we will go to Hagerstown when the time is right. My heart feels light. I have let go of my bitterness and anger. Now all that I feel is love and compassion for those I am supposed to develop relationships with in the future... because I know that the biggest and deepest cry of our nation is for LOVE... People who love people...

Today is Day 1 of my soul's restoration. I simply cannot wait to see what God has in store... I am ready to be used for His glory and LOVE like I never have before...

Going The Extra Mile...

As we are finishing up the "Blessed" series at Destiny (destinychurch.info), we have been encouraged to participate in a 3 day fast. For some of us (I would say MOST of us younger people) fasting seems like some sort of distant and weird thing... So let me explain what fasting has become for me...

When I fast I lay aside one thing that soaks up a lot of my time or something that is very important to me and instead focus my time in prayer about something specific in my life that needs an answer or for something that is very important to me.

For example: during this fast I have decided to give up facebook. It has become a slight addiction for me and I waste a lot of my time on it. Instead I will spend my time praying that God will bless mine and Adam's youth group and our future marriage and our jobs.

Check this out:
Ezra 8:23- "So we fasted and petitioned our God about this, and he answered our prayer."
Pretty cool, huh? When we lay aside certain things in our life and seek God is prayer, we will see these prayers answered. Why? Because we are choosing to put God first... and above all that we care about... and thats EXACTLY where He desires to be and where He belongs. When we trust and seek him AMAZING things will happen.



So where do you begin...? First recognize the thing in your life that takes up most of your time. Next lay that thing aside. Third, go to God with whatever needs the most prayer and begin to pray to Him about that... Lastly, P.U.S.H. Pray until something happens... pray until you see God move, until you see your prayers answered. This may take a day... this may take MONTHS... but don't give up. Trust that God will see you through and that He WILL answer your prayers.

If you don't have something to pray about I encourage you to go to onemillionpraying.org and begin praying for the prosecuted church. They need our prayers.

I believe that we are about to see God do AMAZING things. Trust Him!

Focus

How easy it is to forget.

How easy it is to lose focus.

Sometimes we need to take the time put the focus back in our lives.

Lately, the topic of discussion in my life has been about my future. About the plans that God has for us. Did you know God has a plan for YOU? Sure God has a plan for your pastor... but God also has a beautiful plan for YOUR life.

Sometimes its so easy to forget that there truly is a God who KNOWS you. Not a God that exists and sometimes decides to glance your way, but a God that truly KNOWS you... even down to the things you don't even know. So not only does He know you, but He knows you better than you know yourself. Now that is hard to imagine, but its true. And it is as true for my life as it is for yours.

Take time this week to truly seek out God and see what He has planned for your life and begin to write down those plans. If you need to carry them around with you, DO IT! If you need to discuss these plans with a person who will support you, DO IT! Be encouraged and don't lose sight. There is no one else on the face of this earth that will accomplish the things God has planned specifically for YOU.

If you don't know God... get to know Him! There is nothing the Creator wants more than for you to want to know Him. He cares for you more than you could ever imagine!

My Shooting Star, My Promise

Recently I found myself reading through old journal entries. Sometimes I like to do this to see how far God has brought me... or just to relive some memories.

I stumbled upon one from 2006 that was just oozing with the realization about how much God loves me...

Here's the story...

I was having REALLY tough issues of not feeling like I was good enough, and struggling a ton with depression. At this time in my life depression was one of my closest friends. On this one occassion, this one night when I was home alone and just surrounded in the murkiness of depression I went outside to try and get away from everything. At this point I was living out in the country where the only neighbors I had were cows, cows, and more cows :) I laid out on the grass in the middle of my big yard in complete darkness (it was a cloudy night) and started to cry out to God... I felt like I was completely alone... God wasn't listening. Why would He? I remember saying "show me a sign to let me know You're here." Before I could even start to feel ashamed for asking God to prove Himself the sky was FILLED with stars... The clouds had COMPLETELY disappeared... My heart started to melt. Then a brilliant shooting star shot across the sky... I knew at that exact moment that God was there... that He was listening... and that He LOVED me... and He had NEVER left my side...

God knows our hearts... God hears our prayers. Even when it seems like you are the last person God wants to hear from or love on... He is right there anticipating the next thing You'll say to Him. He LOVES you... He loves YOU! You are precious to Him... He has never created anything else like you... You are His jewel.

Ask God to show you a sign of His love for you... It may be a sky filled with stars, or a bay covered in starfish (as in "Captivating" by Jhn and Stasi Eldredge). Just as you are unique to God, so is His love for you... and He wants to show it you. Just ask. I would love to hear what you find!

Spent the Night With The Lions... Not a Scratch To Be Seen...

I know its been an EXTREME amount of time since I last posted something (atleast I feel like it has haha). I wanted to take the opportunity to catch you up on everything going on in my life :)



If you read "Caught In A Den of Lions" you know that life got TOUGH... really tough. But I knew that God had something planned for me to come out of the toughness. The past 4 months have possibly been the GREATEST learning experience of my life.



As I wrote I lost my car and my apartment within a few short days... And as I said I was going to I remained peaceful through the whole experience. I knew that I obviously couldn't trust in myself anymore... I had done that for WAYYYY too long and it got me nowhere. And left me with nothing to my name...



Since I decided to trust God my life took a 180...



I now live somewhere RENT FREE, and I have a WONDERFUL, safe, dependable car that I got for a ridiculously low price (by the GRACE of God).



But God didn't stop there... :)



Oh, not in the least bit.



I was offered a better place to work and now do what I LOOOOOOVE.



I got ENGAGED to the man of my dreams!



The church that Adam interned at this summer offered him the youth pastor position at their campus in Winchester. Our first youth event is this Sunday!



Not only did God take care of the things I felt I needed... but He blessed me beyond that with things I had been dreaming about for a long time. I say all of this, just to encourage you to TRUST God. He brings you through the valley or the lion's den for a greater prupose. My purpose was to learn to lean only on Him, I had NOTHING, so He became my EVERYTHING. God does not bring us through trials as a way of showing His disappointment with us, but to lavish His love upon us... and bring us into the relationship we were created to have with Him.



Whatever you have on your shoulders... lay it on God's. Trust Him. He will bring you through and reveal His love and Will to you, without a scratch to be seen!

Simply Jesus.

I was going to write about this... But I thought it would just be easier for me to show you :) I think over the years... the definition of church and Jesus have become distorted...

http://vimeo.com/14903345

Caught In A Den of Lions

"Sometimes life throws you curve balls." I've heard this saying time and time again in my life... and never has it rang so true as it has the past month and a half. In a few short weeks I have lost my car and my apartment.

Initial Reaction? Bitterness, anger, neglect...

Current State? Joyful, hopeful, at peace.

When I was in an "accident" about a month and half ago I felt hopeless. Its easy sometimes to see our loss as God's neglect. But that couldn't be further from the truth. Its in our loss that God desires to teach us greatly.

What did I need to learn?

TRUST.

Like most people I have chosen to trust in myself. It seems easier to depend on yourself than to lay your life in the hands of the Unseen. But God desires us to trust Him with that... with our WHOLE lives. Not just partial. One of the many definitions of immerse is to "fully submerge"... to immerse yourself in God's love, you cannot be partial. The same goes with trusting Him... you cannot be partial. When I realized that God was teaching me to trust, my whole persona changed... Suddenly peace surrounded me. I realized He was in control of ALL my life and was taking care of me. Stress fled from me (if you know me I tend to stress A LOT). Not too long after I learned to truly trust God I got a message from my landlord saying I had two weeks to move out...

I decided to praise God instead of stress.

And I truly feel like a new person. I look at things first with joy knowing even in the worst conditions God is going to take care of me. Daniel was in a pit of lions and still praised God... How can I not? Life is sweeter to the taste knowing that the God that holds the whole universe and brings together all things for His good is taking care of me.

I challenge you.

If you are going through tough times... or even blessed times, turn your hope and trust to God. You will NEVER be able to fulfill your purpose alone. It can't be done. We weren't created to live without our Creator. He will ALWAYS know whats best.

Praise Him in your den of lions.

He will bring you through with more to show than when you began.